Desires and beliefs

Drew’s Reminder,

 “Desires and beliefs”  

     I am not a salesman.  I don't work well by myself.  I wasn't born to be athletic.  After the wedding real life starts and all that passionate stuff in the beginning dissipates.  You can't teach an old dog a new trick.  Love just doesn't love me.  I am just not ready right now.  I'll do it when I'm ready. Do any of these statements sound familiar?  Maybe you've said them before or maybe you've heard someone else say them.  I consider all of those statements limiting beliefs.

     What is a limiting belief?  A limiting belief is any belief you have that is getting in the way of you reaching your potential.  This definition get's tricking because thinking that your potential is limited itself is a limited belief.  So we have to get over that hurdle first.  You see you were born in the likeness of your creator.  You were born in a world of abundance.  You are one with this world; therefore you have access to all of its abundance.  As I stated over and over again, everything you need is already within you.

      I know, all of that sounds like pie in the sky.  Skeptics will say everyone can't have everything they want.  That statement is also a limited belief.  However, I will accept the rebuttal and agree.  You won't get everything you want out of life.   I mean that in the literal sense.  You will not just stand up and say I want to be a physicist and tomorrow you'll be a physicist.  But what you can have are your true desires.  Let me ask you a question.  Have you clearly defined your desires in life?

     I know many of you will say, of course I know what my desires are.  If that was your answer then you missed the question.   The question was have you clearly defined your true desires.  Once you clearly define your desires you can put an action plan in place to achieve them.  Without clear definition you will not be able to get to your final destination.  It's kind of like saying you are going to go on vacation to a beach and not having a clear plan.  Imagine packing all of your clothes, getting in the car and turning on the GPS.  If you don't have the exact address in the GPS you will just go in a general direction.  If you choose south you may eventually end up at a beach.  However, when you get there, where are you going to stay?  What if there isn't any vacancy because there is a big event happening at the time your arrived?  What if you end up at a community that is only houses and there are no hotels in the area to even choose?

     Of course, most of you would not handle a vacation like that.  If you have a week of vacation you will decide months ahead of time where you want to go.  You will research locations so you get exactly what you want out of the vacation.  You will decide what you will do everyday.  You will decide where you will stay.  You will research the restaurants to decide where you will eat.  You will take direct action so the vacation is exactly like you want it to be.  If you go somewhere you've never been before you will accept the fact that things may not go exactly as planned.  You may get there and decide to eat somewhere other than the restaurants you researched.  You may do some activities that you hadn't planned to do months before.  You will plan but you are perfectly acceptable if things don't go exactly as planned as long as it’s a good vacation.

      I gave that example because you should clearly define your desires in life in the same manner.  The problem is many of us don't.  Many of us will say what we desire and just do the best we think we can to achieve it.  Many of us will say, "I desire a good paying job"?  Others will say, "I want a big house with a basement."  One of the most common sayings is, "I want to get married and have kids."  Those are all desires.  However, they aren't clearly defined.  Combine the lack of definition and any limiting beliefs you have and you will struggle to get any of them.  You may end up getting everyone one of them and still not be happy because you lacked definition of the true desire.

     I don't know what your limiting beliefs are; all I know is that you have them.  Your beliefs are the foundation of the results you are receiving in your life.  You create your own reality.  If you believe you will fail, you will fail.  If you believe you will be successful, you will be successful.  Life seems complicated to most and the only way to handle that complexity is to break it down to its simplest form.  You will have to do some work to break the complexity down.  You have to define your desires and remove your limiting beliefs.  Both tasks will take some work.  Analyze your desires and write them down in detail.  You have to know what they are to take action to bring them to life.  Everything you need to bring them to life is already within you.  You have to do the work to make them a reality.  You also have to analyze and acknowledge your limiting beliefs.  Once you know what they are you have to eliminate them by telling yourself better stories about them.  No one else can do this for you.  I can tell you over and over again how great you are or how you can have whatever you desire.  However, nothing will come of it until you belief it yourself.  If you believe it yourself you will tell yourself better stories about your life and thus eliminate your limiting beliefs.

      Let's take the desire, "I desire a good paying job."   How could you define that in more detail to ensure your success?  That is something you have to answer for yourself.  I will tell you how I would rephrase that desire with the detail necessary.  I don't just desire a good paying job.  I desire a job that allows me to take an idea and make it a reality.  I am a very creative person and want to access that skill every opportunity that I can.  I want to be paid enough money to comfortably live the life style I desire to live today.  That includes traveling without concern for cost, paying my children's college tuition, buying my wife diamonds, owning property in the Caribbean and growing my relationships with my family and friends.  I desire a job in a setting where my voice is heard and my opinion is requested.  I want to influence decisions from the lowest level employee to the head of the company.  I want a job that respects my work life balance and allows me to decided how and when to get the work done. 

     Now let's look at potential limiting beliefs you may have about getting a good paying job.  I may think that no one is going to pay my $175,000 a year because no one is paying that type of money unless you (fill in the blank).  If you believe that then you will never make $175,000 a year unless you (whatever you filled in the blank with).  However, I guarantee there's someone out there making that salary that doesn't have that (fill in the blank).   You may believe that once you reach a certain salary level you automatically lose your work life balance.  I guarantee there's someone out there making that salary and maintaining a great work life balance.  You may believe that no one will listen to you because of the level of job you are in and therefore you can't influence decisions.  I can go on and on.

     So instead of thinking those limiting beliefs, tell yourself better stories.  Tell yourself that although it may seem that I will not get a job paying me $175,000 unless I (fill in the blank); I believe when I put in the right action plan I can get a job paying me $175,000.  Although many people seem to lose their work life balance once they reach a certain level; I believe I can reach that level in the right job and maintain my work life balance.  Although it may seem difficult for others to influence decisions; I believe when I put the appropriate actions in place I can influence decisions at all levels of my company.  All of those are examples of better stories.  They all will help you achieve your desires.  They will not limit you.  You don't need limitations.  You need to believe in order to achieve.  Instead of letting your beliefs hold you back, use your beliefs to propel you forward.  Everything you need is already within you.  Believing that statement is your first step.  Let this serve as your reminder.  Enjoy the journey!    

With gratitude,

Drew