Share some praise today

Drew’s Reminder,

Share some praise today. 

      I just finished reading the book, How to Win Friends and Influence People by Dale Carnegie.  It’s an excellent book that I will re-read over and over again.  There are too many great points that stood out in the book to tell you about so I’ve chosen one for this week.  In one section of the book Dale says praise is like water to a plant.  Here’s my interpretation of that statement.  Water makes a plant grow.  Along with good sunshine and soil it makes a plant vibrant and flourishing.  Praise along with other aspects in life will do the same for us human beings.  We all know this because we all love to be praised.  However, many of us have a hard time doing it. 

      There are many of us who un-proportionately gravitate to the negative.  The unfortunate part is we don’t even recognize the effect our words have on others and the potential effect they could have had if said differently.  I will give you an example from my own life.  I graduated high school almost 30 years ago and I still strongly remember the pain associated with a comment my mother made when she read my last report card.  I was always a good student.  I was even placed in gifted classes in elementary school.  Because I was smart many things came easy to me so I will admit I didn’t work hard in high school.  With that said I still always got mostly A’s and a few B’s.  I graduated with a 3.65. 

       However, my senior year I did get a 4.0.  This was after having to move from Kansas, where I had been since I was a freshman, to Louisiana in October of my senior year.  Despite all of that change I still was able to get a 4.0.  Great achievement wasn’t it?  I surely thought so.  However that’s not how I felt after my mother said “straight A’s, wow, why didn’t you do this all 4 years?”  Just to give you some further context, I already had been awarded a 4 year Army ROTC scholarship and was headed to college.  I was really hurt by that comment because I was admittedly looking for some praise at that time.  

     Now let’s talk about today.  Today I’m a parent.  I believe I’m a great parent.  I get praise from my younger sister all the time about how great parents my wife and I are to our kids.  I always thank her for the compliments and I remain humble.  But what she doesn’t know is that her praise motivates me.  It motivates me to be an even better parent.  My Dad gives me the same praise and it motivates me even more.  Could I continue to be a good parent without their praise?  Yes of course.  That praise is fuel for me to be an even better parent.  They have done my family a great favor by merely sharing some praise.  Think about how much better we all could be if we all took some time to focus on giving some praise.  Next time you are interacting with someone and want to share your thoughts think about how effective it could be if you shared some praise as well.

With gratitude,

Drew

We cannot teach a person

Drew’s Reminder,

 “We cannot teach people anything; we can only help them discover it within themselves.”

Galileo Galilei

 I read this quote and it immediately connected with me.  It’s the reason I started this blog.  It’s the premise as to why I call it a reminder and not a lesson.  I’m not teaching you anything.  I’m reminding you of what you already know.  It’s inside you.  Everything that we desire is already within us.  For a long time it was hard for me to embrace that fact.  If you are running into the same issue I can relate.  So what got me over my limiting beliefs and allowed me to embrace this fact?  It was gratitude.  

       A good friend of mine and I were researching gifts of appreciation to try and start a business.  I thought the more I could learn about the appreciation the easier it would be to come up with ideas for gifts that show appreciation.  That led me to internet and my go to tool, google.  I’ve always loved the word gratitude.  I’ve never really used it but enjoyed how the Spartans would end their discussions in the movies with “gratitude”.  Every time I would search for information on appreciation I would see the word gratitude.  I then found myself researching gratitude.  All of that led to me purchasing the book “The Magic”, by Rhonda Byrne.   

       The book is a guide to 28 days of expressing gratitude.  The goal of the book is to build a habit and for me it did.  That habit was to see the world through a lens of gratitude.  When you genuinely express gratitude towards something you attract more of it into your life.  The book didn’t teach me anything.  It helped me discover something that was already within me.  I discovered how happy I could really be.  Up until those moments I’d never experience prolonged happiness as I do now.  I know and believe that this is just the beginning.  I know that everything I desire is already within me.  I just needed a reminder to help bring it out.  Whether it takes 28 days or 1 writing of a blog, I know this to be true.  Now I’ve just reminded you of the same.

With gratitude,

Drew

The feeling is more important than the...

Drew’s Reminder,

The feeling is more important than the ____?  

     I remember it like it was yesterday.  The summer of 1986 I got what I thought was the greatest gift for my birthday.  It was a pair of Air Jordans that cost $64.  I didn’t come from a silver spoon so a $64 pair of shoes was a big deal in 1986.  At the time I really wanted those shoes.  At least that is what I thought I wanted.  

     I now know what I really wanted was the feeling that I felt walking around in those shoes.  I  felt confident.  I felt secure.  I felt like the man.  That was a long time ago but I’m sure I attracted more things I desired that summer after getting those shoes that I did before receiving those shoes.  That’s because my thoughts were now supercharged with the positive emotions I felt when wearing those shoes.  

     Your thoughts are energy.  When you combine a thought with an emotion that energy becomes so supercharge it acts like a magnet.  It will attract like energy.  That means it will attract the situations, the people, the actions and anything else that corresponds to the thoughts that you have projected.  But I didn’t need those shoes to have those positive emotions.  I wanted to feel confident.  I wanted to feel secure.  I wanted to feel like the man.  What I should have done is concentrated on feeling all of those ways.  

     Here’s why.  What if I wouldn’t have gotten those shoes?  I would have been disappointed.  I would have then added disappointment to my thoughts of not having those shoes.  I would have then attracted more situations, people, actions and anything else that would have corresponded to not having those shoes.  That’s not the cycle I want to be on.  I’d rather be on the cycle of feeling confident, feeling secure, and feeling like the man, which will attract more situations, people, actions or anything else to keep me feeling that way.  

     So that’s why I say it’s more important to concentrate on the feelings that you want than the things that you want.  In the end you just want that thing because it will make you feel a certain way.  Reverse the order and feel that certain way now so you can attract the things you desire.  You control your thoughts and emotions.  By taking control of your thoughts and emotions you stand the best chance of your life becoming everything you want it to be.

     

With gratitude,

Drew

Can you stand the rain?

Drew’s Reminder,

Can you stand the rain?  
      I was listening to my device this weekend and this beautiful song by New Edition started to play. The song itself is about a man questioning whether a woman can truly be with  him in both good times and bad times.  It’s a love song.  Yet it made me think of life in general.  

      If you don’t know the song here are some excerpts from it.  “Sunny days, everybody loves them”. When it comes to life that is true.  We all love the good times.  That’s what we are here for so of course we love the good times.  “Storms will come, this we know for sure”. When it comes to life this is also true.  Storms will come and I’m sure they have come in your life.  Some of you may even be in a storm right now.  

      The question is “Can you stand the rain?”  The overwhelming answer is yes.  Yes, you can stand the rain.  You are equipped to handle everything that life throws at you.  The reality is life will throw things at you.  There will be storms.  Just don’t let those storms deter you. You can and will stand the rain.  If you are in debt now more than you’d like to be, you will get out of it.  If you have lost your job and are unemployed, you will get back on your feet.  If you have not successfully found the love of your life, you will be with them soon.
  
      How can I say that and I don’t even know you?  It’s because I know, just as you do, that you can stand the rain.  Think back in your past of the storms of your life.  You survived them.  They have passed.  The sun came out and the day was beautiful.  Hopefully the day is beautiful right now.  You have gotten through many storms.  Wear the badge of confidence that you can stand the rain.  It will make the storms pass so much easier.

     

With gratitude,

Drew